ParentHaught: “UH-OH!”

Uh-Oh!

The other day my wife, my daughter (Lucy) and I were coming home from a walk. We went via a cricket oval.

It was late afternoon and a game had just finished. We passed the pavilion and began to climb the hill towards our house when we all noticed a cricketer having a wizzle up against a fence of a nearby house.

He wasn’t particularly well hidden – there was just a barely living clump of bush obscuring his dude – but we probably wouldn’t have noticed him had it not been for the fact he was emitting wind with gay abandon.… Read the rest

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The Haught guide to work toilet banditry

Highwayman with poo quote

Foul behaviour

I’m widely known as a man of the people, but even I, in my infinite magnanimity, don’t much go for crowds. Don’t get me wrong; I love a crowd when it’s overthrowing a tyrannical regime or when a segment of it, wearing the colours of my team, rises in unison and in a roaring crescendo outpours its collective assent to a goal.

And that’s the thing: a crowd needs a great and compelling common purpose for it to become a noble entity. So, it’s not the seething proletarian mob or the hot-blooded congregation of football lovers I can’t abide. It’s the crowd made of people who don’t really have their heart in the cause they’re prosecuting or the event they’re participating in.… Read the rest

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