The year is 2062. A curious young lad asks his grandfather about a long-forgotten set of work techniques known as Agile Methodology.
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Some people ask me while I’m signing autographs or they’re basking in the fresh-baked-bread warmth of my celebrity, “Jonathan, have…
Read MoreThe worst mistake you can make as a citizen of the 21st century is believe that the age in which it was possible to quit one’s job and take to the road selling a miracle tincture made of tree sap, rancid avocado juice and buffalo urine is long past.
Read MoreThe last installment of the Pat Raw Chronicles ended with Haught fan Julianne Rice suggesting that it was “only a…
Read MoreIf you’re new to Haught and haven’t yet got onto the official Haught Facebook page, you might not know who…
Read MoreLast week Barack Obama was re-elected as the Prime Minister of the Uniting States of America. This caused a great…
Read MoreIs there a more frustrating end to a conversation than “get over it?” Possibly “whatever” or a massive expulsion of…
Read MoreDifficult people are a dime a dozen, aren’t they? That’s less than one cent each, and still you’re probably paying…
Read MoreWhile I may be the world’s most promising and precocious literary talent, this doesn’t change the fact that I am as ugly as sin. And I’m not talking about one of the spurious Catholic ones like “original sin” or one of the piss-weak Deadly ones like sloth or gluttony; I’m talking about the absolute shockers like wrath, Avada Kedavra and, by far the worst of all, vanity. (I absolutely abhor arrogance and conceit, and as the owner of a Chapel Street night club, you undoubtedly do too.)
I’m so unattractive, my wife employs a Perseus-style mirror-plated shield when conversing with me. I’m so unattractive, I’m reluctant to have children because I fear that if my son or daughter got my face genes, I’d be dragged to The Hague and charged with crimes against humanity.
Read MoreSometimes I receive messages in the spiced ham folder of my email that get me so excited I feel like…
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